At this point, Scarlett Johansson makes most of her money from her myriad modeling contracts rather than her “acting” career. Over the past few years, she worked as the face of L’Oreal, Louis Vuitton, Dolce & Gabbana, Mango and Moet & Chandon Champagne – I think there are more, but those are just the ones I could think of off the top of my head. Oh! And Reebok. I forgot about them. What’s strange is that all of Scarlett’s ads seem to follow the same basic “look” – her hair is always light, usually in a platinum Marilyn Monroe coif, but sometimes she’s a light strawberry-blonde. She’s almost always reclining on something, which makes me think that she’s too lazy to bother with “posing”. And her mouth is almost always open, and a vapid, mouth-breathing expression is on her face. As I was looking at Scar’s old ads, I noticed the theme. It’s kind of scary how they all blend together. She’s not a good model. Perhaps that’s why Mango ditched her? Either that, or because she always looked so corpsey in their ads.
So these are Scarlett’s latest ads for Dolce & Gabbana. They’re for the makeup line – something for “Secret Eyes Mascara” and “the Creamy Foundation and Passion Duo Lipstick line.” Sure. ScarJo says about the mascara, “I’ll start with a light flirty look in the morning, then later I’ll want something fuller and more dramatic. Secret Eyes has a divine texture so you can feel free to layer.” Unfortunately, I have to say it: why would hire ScarJo if you’re just going to Photoshop her to the point where you’ve given her a pig nose? LOOK AT HER PIG-NOSE. It’s ridiculous. Scarlett’s real nose looks nothing like that. Jennifer Aniston had a similar Photoshop problem with some recent SmartWater ads too – some Photoshop wizard just loves to give women pig-noses. Ah, well. At least David Gandy isn’t grinding on Scarlett in these ads. That would have been too much.
Here’s what Scarlett really looks like, post-Sean Penn. That man did a number on her.
Ads courtesy of D&G.
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